Chapter 2- Depression
As dawn broke, Ken finally began to stir. Groaning, he sat up, cradling his head as if it were made of glass. What happened? He was sore all over, and not just physically. Oh yeah… He doubled over as all the events, emotions, and actions of the day before came flooding back to him. He nearly let out a sob, but it was then that he sensed another presence in the room.
Turning to look behind him, Ken saw Ryu slumped against the wall, asleep. His legs were stretched out in front of him, and his shoulders were tense, evidence that he'd been up most of the night.
Great. As I slept, he stayed awake. Probably to protect me from the monks. Gods, I can't believe I did that… Guilt wrapped its cold fingers around his heart as Ken reached out to grab Ryu's leg and shake him awake. Still a little groggy and uncoordinated, he accidentally brushed the sole of Ryu's foot. Ryu fidgeted in his sleep and let out a chuckle, curling into a ball on the tatami floor.
Ken couldn't help but smile softly at the sight before him. Ryu was peacefully asleep, all curled up on the floor like he usually slept. Hard to believe that this strong, confident and deadly martial artist could sleep so adorably. Reaching down, he brushed a few of Ryu's bangs back into place. As he reached back, his fingers caressed Ryu's cheek on their own accord.
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Starting at that touch, Ryu slowly began to awaken. Opening bleary eyes, the first thing he saw was Ken's open face, showing his content, loving smile for a second, but when Ken noticed he was looking at him, a cloud of guilt and sadness eclipsed it and he quickly pulled his hand back from Ryu. He was distressed to see Ken act like this, and even more so now that he knew why he was this way. As he sat up, Ken looked away, not meeting his gaze.
"Good morning." Ken's terse reply was bitingly brief, and Ryu inwardly winced at the tone. Just as he was about to return the greeting, a soft knock on the door caused him to stop. Getting up and sliding it open, Ryu found the entire group of monks outside his door.
"Good morning sir. I hope you had a good sleep, but I am sorry to say that, even though this temple is dedicated to training, the damage your companion caused yesterday has caused us to ask you to leave while we make repairs. Please, don't misunderstand. We welcome you to return after the repairs are done, but only once both he and you have your emotions under control. And please tell him to not worry. We've had worse happen to our temple."
Ryu nodded slightly. "I understand. Will you allow us one hour to prepare to depart?"
"Of course, sir, good day." Bowing, the monks turned and left. Closing the door, Ryu turned to look at Ken.
"Ken. We gotta go. The monks need to rebuild." Ryu winced again when he saw Ken flinch at that statement.
"Yeah… sure." Not saying anything more, Ken got up and proceeded to pack his things, his back turned. As he shoved things into his bag, he continued to think about the things that had led up to this. How can I tell Ryu why I lost control like that? How can I even start to tell Ryu why I had left the temple in such a state? Shaking his head, he continued packing. No. I can never tell him. If I do, and my nightmare comes true, I could completely snap… perhaps for good this time.
"Ready?" Ken nodded slightly and stood, shouldering his pack.
"Good. Then we're leaving." Ryu looked at Ken, a slightly sad expression on his face. He hadn't reached any conclusions last night, but the answer is in him somewhere, and he was determined to find out what it is.
Slipping on their sandals, they opened the door and were confronted by a lone monk. Looking at them seriously, he spoke.
"Do you know where you are going to go?" At their twin head-shakes, he said, "There is a cabin not too far from here. It has not been used in years, but it is still in good condition. You could stay there until the temple is fixed."
Ryu nodded. "Ken, what do you think?" He frowned at Ken's non-committal shrug. Turning back to the monk, he said, "We'll go. Can you please show us the direction we should go?"
"Of course sir. I would be happy to show you the way if you like." At Ryu's nod of thanks, the monk led them out of the temple and into the woods. The trip was silent, save for the sound of their feet on the leaves and twigs strewn on the forest floor.
As they walked, Ryu split his attention between their path and location, but also on Ken. He seemed far more subdued, quiet, and almost spiritless after what had happened. His face continued to show shame and sadness every time he looked in Ryu's direction. However, his face also showed a stubborn will that Ryu knew all too well. He knew that with that there, he could not get Ken to talk openly about what had happened.
Nodding to himself, Ryu resolved to break Ken out of this mood if it was the last thing he did. Turning his attention back to the path, he saw the monk stop at the top of the upcoming hill.
"Here we are." The monk pointed down the small slope to a lone cabin. The tile roof was tall and slanted to keep rainwater from pooling, and the walls, though a bit mossy, looked strong and sturdy.
"There is a well in the back, and we will bring you supplies every other day until the repairs are done." Ryu nodded.
"How long will those be?"
"About two months." Ryu blinked, surprised.
"That's pretty fast."
"We're used to fixing things, being a martial arts temple. However, we don't usually need to fix the temple on such a scale. Your friend is strong indeed."
Nodding, Ryu bowed to the monk, throwing a sidelong glance at Ken. Softly clearing his throat, he got Ken's attention enough for a half-hearted bow. The monk silently turned and disappeared into the woods.
Ryu watched him fade into the forest, then turned to Ken. Waving a hand in front of his face, he saw Ken's eyes stare at him disinterestedly.
"Let's get settled, then we'll continue training in about an hour." Ken nodded slightly in response and plodded to the cabin door. Opening it silently, he entered the cabin, the door closing behind him.
Ryu shook his head. Ken wasn't himself. Where was that spring in his step? The joy in his smile and sparkle in his eye? Maybe it was best to leave him alone and not push him for a while. Ryu shook his head again. No. That could only hurt him more. He needs me now, and if I go cold on him, it might break him at this stage. No, I'll focus on bringing him back to himself. Nodding to himself, he waited a moment longer before entering the cabin as well.
Slipping off his sandals, he padded over to the futon that Ken had evidently laid out on the floor, then promptly occupied. He was already asleep again, curled up into a ball. His face bore evidence of tears, and his hands were hugged around himself protectively. He stirred and moaned, constantly shifting around, his sleep restless.
Ryu watched this for only a second before lying down and spooning himself to Ken's back, his arm draped over Ken's waist. At that touch, Ken seemed to calm down, and his breathing grew deeper and more steady as he fell into a more relaxed sleep. His face relaxed and he unconsciously let out a small sigh as he cuddled up neared to the warm, comforting presence behind him.
I guess training can wait. Ryu thought. I got a feeling that he really needs this right now. He made himself more comfortable and soon drifted off as well, his arm over Ken's waist and his chin on Ken's shoulder.